Conversations with My Kid – The Pregnancy Files

Who Doesn’t Love Funny Stories About Kids?

Even before I became a mom, I always enjoyed being around kids. For me, it was always so refreshing to see so many different perspectives on life. You find that easily in children. Why? It’s simple. There are no preconceived notions, no barriers, no responsibilities. Life is simple and there’s a new adventure around every corner, especially during those first few years.

Of course, one of the things that I have really enjoyed as a parent is watching my son learn. I might be a bit biased, but my child is really quite brilliant. At 3 years old, he has a vocabulary that surpasses that of some adults. He uses words that I would never expect a three year old to use and he uses them correctly, although he can’t yet read or write.

He counts to 20 without issue. He can work my BlackBerry better than I can. He also knows how to use a screwdriver, the microwave and operate our finicky remote. Maybe this is normal, but I’m in awe. Do most three year olds know how to do these things? I opted out of the “What to Expect” book. I figured attending nursing school taught me most of the important stuff.

I just didn’t realize that parenthood would be so surprising! Who knew it was such an adventure?

What kills me is the questions that he asks. Some just leave me with my mouth hanging open. I’m sure most of you parents have been there before, but this is my first go-around with a child of my own. I had no idea how many questions toddlers could come up with, let alone their affinity for so many different subjects!

However, it does make for very entertaining days.

The Pregnancy Files

My son has always been very photogenic – yes, even in the womb. It was like he knew we could see him. In fact, at one point, I swear he was flipping us off just to get his kicks – as if he didn’t do that enough while he was in there! (I can’t even count the times that I swore my ribs were bruised from the inside!)

My Son in the Womb

Does it look like he's flipping off the camera or is it just me?

So it really came as no surprise to me that, as he grew older, he fell in love with pictures. It all started with getting his picture taken. He loved the camera and I don’t think I can count how many times he’s pulled out the camera and asked me to take his picture. It used to be a daily thing.

From Subject to Appreciator

My son has recently become more interested in seeing pictures instead of having them taken. In fact, he’s almost like a red carpet star when it comes to having his photo taken these days. He’ll ham it up for 2-3 pictures and then he puts his hand up, quite matter-of-factly, and very seriously states, “No more pictures. That’s all, mommy.”

This recent change has resulted in his viewing of my photos in a different light. He’s like my little photo critic. He’ll tell me if he likes it, if it’s funny, if I need to take a new picture…you get the idea. He’s three, so he’s learning all of this new stuff and he wants to contribute his thoughts on everything. I think it’s fantastic, albeit a bit frustrating at times. Still, I listen and I take all of his comments in stride. I like to feel like I’ve been heard and I’d like my child to feel the same way.

Mommy, the Cannibal

His new found love of looking at pictures has sparked many questions. The other day, he asked me if he could see pictures of himself as a baby. Of course, I told him to come over to the computer and sit on my lap. I opened folder after folder full of images of him as an infant. We looked at all of the pictures taken at the hospital, before and right after his birth, pictures of us bringing him home and pictures of him over the last three years.

Finally, I opened up my pregnancy picture folder and showed him what I looked like when I was pregnant with him. He seemed confused. “Where am I at, mommy?” He asked.

“You’re in my belly. See how big mommy’s belly is? That’s because you were in there growing.” I said, mousing over my fat belly to point it out for him while remembering how special that time was for me.

Then came a big gasp of surprise and his very serious question,”Mommy! Why’d you eat me?!?!”

Ahahahaha! I could barely contain myself, but the expression on his little face was just sooo very serious that I did my best not to laugh. I said, “I didn’t eat you, sweetie. You grew inside of me into a baby…kind of like how chickens come from an egg. You started out as an egg and then grew into a baby in my belly. When you were ready to come out, you did, and that’s when daddy and I got to meet you.”

“Well,” he said, shaking his little head side to side, “I don’t want to go back in there.”

Of course, my response was, “Well I don’t want you to go back in there either!”

Ahh…you’ve got to love the way kids think.

Have a funny story about your child that you’d like to share? Leave me a comment below!


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